You know you need power of attorney for your parent or spouse with dementia, but you're not sure where to start. What type of POA do you need? What should it include? Who should you name as agent? How do you actually use it once you have it? This checklist walks you through every step from deciding you need POA through executing documents and using your authority to help your loved one.
Why power of attorney is critical with dementia:
Power of attorney is the single most important legal document for dementia care. Without it, you cannot legally access bank accounts, pay bills, manage investments, sell property, or handle any financial matters when your loved one can no longer manage independently. Even spouses often discover they lack automatic authority over accounts or property. POA must be completed while the person still has legal capacity, making it time-sensitive and urgent after dementia diagnosis.
Key Takeaway:
Two types of power of attorney are essential for dementia: (1) Financial power of attorney manages money, property, and financial affairs; (2) Healthcare power of attorney (healthcare proxy) makes medical decisions. Both must be completed while your loved one still has legal capacity. This checklist covers financial POA primarily, with healthcare POA basics included.
Let's ensure your loved one has the protection they need.
Phase 1: Deciding POA Is Needed
Use this checklist to assess whether it's time to establish power of attorney.
☐ Assess current situation
Check if any of these apply:
- Dementia has been diagnosed (any stage)
- Memory problems are affecting financial management
- Bills are being paid late or not at all
- Checkbook has errors or doesn't balance
- Mail and paperwork are piling up unmanaged
- Loved one expresses confusion about finances
- You've had to help with financial tasks
- Concern about future inability to manage finances
If one or more applies: POA is needed now, not later.
☐ Determine urgency level
Immediate urgency (complete within 2-4 weeks):
- Recent dementia diagnosis
- Rapid cognitive decline observed
- Financial problems already occurring
- Capacity becoming questionable
High urgency (complete within 1-2 months):
- Early-stage dementia diagnosed
- Still managing adequately but changes noticed
- Want to plan while capacity is clearly present
Never "low urgency": Once dementia is diagnosed, POA is always urgent because capacity can be lost unpredictably.
☐ Check for existing POA
Review whether POA already exists:
- Check safe deposit boxes
- Look through important documents file
- Ask family members if they know
- Check with attorney who handled prior estate planning
- Ask loved one directly if they remember signing POA
If old POA exists: Review with elder law attorney to ensure it's adequate for dementia situation, includes necessary powers for long-term care, and agents named are still appropriate.
☐ Confirm capacity still exists
Capacity indicators:
- Can explain what power of attorney means
- Understands they're giving someone authority over finances
- Can name who they're appointing
- Knows generally what assets they have
- Can communicate decisions
If capacity is questionable: Schedule attorney consultation immediately. Even borderline capacity may be sufficient with proper attorney assessment and documentation.
For more context on legal planning urgency, see our comprehensive legal planning after dementia diagnosis guide.
Phase 2: Understanding POA Types and Choosing the Right One
Select the appropriate type and scope of power of attorney for dementia situations.
☐ Understand durable vs. springing POA
Durable POA (recommended for dementia):
- Effective immediately upon signing
- Remains valid when person becomes incapacitated
- Agent can act right away if needed
- No capacity determination required to use
Springing POA (NOT recommended for dementia):
- Takes effect only when person becomes incapacitated
- Requires formal capacity determination
- Creates delays when help is needed
- Capacity assessment can be disputed
Choose: Durable POA for dementia situations
☐ Decide on POA scope
General (broad) POA:
Covers all financial matters. Most appropriate for dementia. Agent has full authority over finances.
Limited (specific) POA:
Covers only specific transactions or accounts. Not sufficient for dementia situations.
Choose: General durable power of attorney
☐ Determine if both financial and healthcare POAs are needed
Financial POA covers:
- Banking and investments
- Bill payment
- Property management
- Tax matters
- Business decisions
Healthcare POA covers:
- Medical treatment decisions
- Facility placement
- Care providers
- End-of-life choices
Recommendation: Get both. Medical and financial decisions are separate, requiring separate authorities.
Phase 3: Selecting the Right Agent
Choosing who will have power of attorney is one of the most important decisions.
☐ Consider agent qualifications
Essential characteristics:
- Trustworthy and honest
- Financially responsible
- Organized and detail-oriented
- Able to handle stress and family conflict
- Available and responsive
- Good judgment
- Willing to serve
☐ Decide on co-agents vs. sole agent
Sole agent (one person acts alone):
- Faster decision-making
- No coordination needed
- Clear authority
- Recommended unless specific reason for co-agents
Co-agents (two or more must act together):
- Requires agreement on every decision
- Slows processes
- Can cause deadlock if disagreement
- Provides checks and balances
Recommendation: Sole agent with successor agents, not co-agents
☐ Name successor agents
Why successors matter: Primary agent may become unable to serve (illness, death, conflict). Name at least 2 successor agents in order of preference. Successors step in automatically if primary can't serve.
Example succession:
- Primary: Adult child A
- First successor: Adult child B
- Second successor: Trusted family friend
☐ Discuss role with potential agents before naming them
Have honest conversation:
- "I want to name you as my POA agent. Are you willing and able to take this on?"
- Explain responsibilities involved
- Discuss potential family dynamics
- Ensure they understand time commitment
- Confirm they can be objective and act in loved one's best interest
Don't surprise someone by naming them without discussion.
Phase 4: Finding and Working with an Attorney
Proper POA documents require attorney expertise, especially with dementia involved.
☐ Find qualified elder law attorney
Search resources:
- National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys (naela.org)
- State bar association elder law sections
- Referrals from doctor or financial advisor
Look for:
- CELA (Certified Elder Law Attorney) credential
- Experience with dementia clients specifically
- Positive reviews from families
☐ Gather required information for attorney
Personal information:
- Full legal names and addresses
- Social Security numbers
- Birth dates and places
- Marriage certificates, divorce decrees
Financial information:
- Bank accounts with balances
- Investment accounts
- Real estate owned
- Retirement accounts
- Debts and liabilities
☐ Prepare questions for attorney
- What type of POA do you recommend for this situation?
- What specific powers should be included?
- How do we ensure this will work for long-term care needs?
- How is capacity assessed and documented?
- What are the costs?
- How long until documents are ready?
- How do we use the POA once it's signed?
For comprehensive attorney guidance, see our legal planning after dementia diagnosis article.
Phase 5: Ensuring POA Includes Essential Powers
Standard POA forms may lack powers needed for dementia care. Verify these are included.
☐ Confirm general financial powers
Basic powers (usually included):
- Access and manage bank accounts
- Pay bills and expenses
- Manage investments
- File taxes
- Handle insurance matters
- Manage real estate
☐ Verify Medicaid and benefit planning powers
Critical for dementia (often missing from standard forms):
- Make gifts (needed for Medicaid planning)
- Create or modify trusts
- Change beneficiary designations
- Transfer assets (for Medicaid spend-down)
- Disclaim inheritances
Why essential: Without these, agent can't do Medicaid planning to protect assets and qualify for long-term care benefits.
Ask attorney: "Does this POA include gifting and Medicaid planning powers?"
☐ Ensure long-term care facility powers
Specific powers needed:
- Contract with care facilities
- Arrange for in-home care services
- Hire and fire caregivers
- Access funds for care expenses
- Make facility placement decisions
☐ Confirm digital asset access
Modern necessity:
- Access online banking
- Manage digital accounts
- Access email if needed for account recovery
- Handle online bill payment
Explicit language: Should specifically authorize access to electronic and digital records and accounts.
Phase 6: Executing POA Documents Properly
Improper execution can invalidate POA. Follow these steps precisely.
☐ Schedule signing appointment
Timing:
- Schedule at time of day when loved one is most alert
- Ensure adequate time (30-60 minutes typically)
- Don't rush
- Avoid days when loved one is tired, sick, or stressed
☐ Verify capacity at signing
Attorney will assess:
- Does person understand what POA is?
- Can they name who they're appointing?
- Do they comprehend powers being granted?
- Are they signing voluntarily?
Be honest with attorney about capacity concerns. Attorney must be satisfied capacity exists.
☐ Meet witness requirements
Typical requirements:
- Two witnesses (requirements vary by state)
- Witnesses cannot be the agent or beneficiaries
- Witnesses must be adults
- Attorney's staff usually serves as witnesses
☐ Get documents notarized
Notary public:
- Verifies identity of person signing
- Confirms voluntary signing
- Applies official seal and signature
- Required in most states for POA
☐ Obtain multiple original copies
Request several originals:
- One for agent
- One for principal
- One for attorney files
- Spares for banks and institutions
Why originals matter: Some banks require original signed POA, not copies.
Phase 7: After Signing - Distribution and Registration
Having documents isn't enough. They must be distributed and sometimes registered.
☐ Notify financial institutions
Provide POA to:
- All banks where loved one has accounts
- Investment companies
- Insurance companies
- Mortgage holders
- Credit card companies
Timing: Do this before POA is needed. Getting POA accepted when opening account is easier than during crisis.
☐ Notify healthcare providers
For healthcare POA:
- Primary care physician
- Specialists
- Hospital on admission
- Facility or care provider
☐ Store originals securely
Safe locations:
- Fireproof safe at home
- Safe deposit box (but ensure agent can access)
- Attorney's office (keep copy accessible at home)
Don't store where agent can't find it during emergency.
☐ Inform other family members
Transparency prevents conflicts: Tell family who has POA authority, explain it was done with attorney guidance, clarify it's for loved one's protection.
Balance: Share that POA exists and who has authority, but financial details can remain private.
For more on family communication, see our guide on how to tell family about dementia diagnosis.
Phase 8: Using POA Authority Effectively
Having POA authority requires understanding responsibilities and limits.
☐ Understand fiduciary duty
Agent's legal obligations:
- Act in principal's best interest, never self-interest
- Keep accurate records of all transactions
- Keep principal's assets separate from own assets
- Avoid conflicts of interest
- Make prudent financial decisions
Consequences of breach: Legal liability, removal as agent, potential criminal charges for misuse.
☐ Set up record-keeping system
Track everything:
- All transactions made using POA
- Expenses paid
- Income received
- Asset sales or purchases
- Communications with financial institutions
☐ Maintain separate accounts
Never commingle funds: Don't deposit principal's money in your account. Don't pay principal's bills from your account. Keep principal's assets completely separate.
Why: Commingling creates appearance of impropriety and makes accounting impossible.
☐ Understand limitations of POA
What POA does NOT allow:
- Making changes to will or trust (only principal can do this with capacity)
- Making gifts beyond what's authorized in document
- Anything contrary to principal's known wishes
- Acting after principal's death (POA ends at death; executor takes over)
Phase 9: Special Situations and Troubleshooting
☐ What to do if institution refuses POA
Options:
- Ask why it's being refused
- Provide additional documentation requested
- Escalate to supervisor or manager
- Have attorney contact institution
- File complaint with regulatory agency if refusal is improper
☐ If capacity was lost before POA was completed
Only option: Court guardianship/conservatorship
- Costs: $10,000-$15,000+
- Takes: 6-12 months
- Requires court hearings and ongoing oversight
This is why advance planning is critical.
☐ If family disputes POA or agent's actions
Steps to address:
- Provide transparent accounting
- Explain decisions and rationale
- Offer to meet with attorney present
- Consider mediation
- If dispute continues, family members can petition court
Prevention: Keep excellent records, communicate regularly, act transparently, always act in principal's best interest.
Phase 10: Ongoing Responsibilities and Maintenance
POA isn't "set it and forget it." Maintain and use authority properly.
☐ Keep POA documents accessible
Always know where to find:
- Original documents
- Copies for institutions
- Attorney contact information
☐ Review POA periodically
Every 2-3 years, check:
- Are agents still appropriate and willing?
- Has family situation changed?
- Are powers still adequate for needs?
- Have laws changed requiring updates?
With dementia: Updates become impossible once capacity is lost, so ensure document is comprehensive initially.
☐ Know when to seek professional help
Consult attorney when:
- Making major asset decisions
- Medicaid planning needed
- Family disputes arise
- Institutions refuse POA
- Unsure if action is within POA authority
How CareThru Helps Manage POA Responsibilities
Power of attorney involves extensive record-keeping and coordination.
Tracking POA documentation: Note where POA documents are stored, which institutions have copies, when it was signed, who the agents are.
Recording transactions: Log financial actions taken using POA authority: bills paid, accounts accessed, major decisions made. Creates accountability record.
Communicating with family: Share updates about how POA authority is being used (respecting appropriate privacy). Transparency prevents disputes.
Organizing for tax time: Track expenses and transactions throughout year for easier tax preparation using POA.
Preparing for attorney consultations: When questions arise about POA authority or decisions, having organized records makes attorney consultations more efficient.
The platform doesn't replace legal advice but provides infrastructure for responsible POA management.
Frequently Asked Questions About Power of Attorney for Dementia
Can I get power of attorney for someone who already has dementia?
Yes, IF they still have legal capacity. Dementia diagnosis doesn't automatically eliminate capacity. Early-stage dementia usually leaves capacity intact. Attorney assesses capacity when POA is signed. Act quickly though, as capacity will eventually be lost. If capacity is already gone, court guardianship is the only option.
What's the difference between power of attorney and guardianship?
Power of attorney is document person signs voluntarily while they have capacity, giving someone authority. Guardianship is court proceeding when capacity is lost without POA. POA costs $1,500-$3,000, takes weeks. Guardianship costs $10,000-$15,000+, takes 6-12 months, requires court oversight. Always do POA if possible to avoid guardianship.
Can a power of attorney transfer money to themselves?
Only if specifically authorized in the POA document for legitimate purposes (reimbursement for expenses paid on principal's behalf). Agents have fiduciary duty to act in principal's best interest, never self-interest. Taking money for personal use is breach of duty and potentially criminal. Keep meticulous records of any transfers.
Do I need a lawyer to create power of attorney?
For dementia situations, YES. Online POA forms often lack powers needed for dementia care (Medicaid planning, gifting, long-term care). Elder law attorney ensures proper capacity assessment, includes necessary powers, and documents signing properly. Cost is $1,500-$3,000, worth it for proper protection.
How long does power of attorney last?
Durable POA lasts until: principal dies, principal revokes it (while they have capacity), or court invalidates it. Does not expire on its own. Remains valid throughout dementia progression and indefinitely. Ends automatically at principal's death (executor then takes over).
Can adult children override power of attorney?
No. Agent named in POA has legal authority to act. Adult children cannot override unless: they obtain guardianship (court removes POA agent), or they prove in court that agent is acting improperly. This is why choosing trustworthy agent is critical.
What if my loved one won't give me power of attorney?
While they have capacity, they control who gets POA. Options: explain benefits and need, involve their doctor in conversation, bring in trusted friend or attorney to discuss, frame as protecting them rather than taking control. If they refuse and capacity exists, their decision must be respected. Keep trying; many people come around after thinking about it.
Can I use power of attorney to place my loved one in memory care?
Financial POA allows contracting with facility and paying for care. Healthcare POA (separate document) may be needed for medical/placement decision-making. Check your POA documents for specific language about facility placement. Some states require specific authorization for facility placement in healthcare POA.
Disclaimer: This checklist provides general guidance about power of attorney for dementia situations and is not legal advice. Laws vary significantly by state. Power of attorney requirements, capacity standards, and agent duties differ by jurisdiction. Always consult qualified elder law attorney licensed in your state for advice specific to your situation.
Sources
- National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys. (2024). "Power of Attorney." Available at: https://www.naela.org
- American Bar Association. (2024). "Durable Power of Attorney." Available at: https://www.americanbar.org
- Alzheimer's Association. (2024). "Legal Documents." Available at: https://www.alz.org/help-support/legal-planning
- Family Caregiver Alliance. (2024). "Powers of Attorney." Available at: https://www.caregiver.org/resource/powers-attorney/
- National Institute on Aging. (2024). "Getting Your Affairs in Order: Legal Documents." Available at: https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/getting-your-affairs-order
- Uniform Law Commission. (2024). "Uniform Power of Attorney Act." Available at: https://www.uniformlaws.org
- Moye, J., et al. (2013). "Assessment of Capacity in an Aging Society." American Psychologist, 68(3), 158-171.
- American College of Trust and Estate Counsel. (2024). "Power of Attorney Guidelines." Available at: https://www.actec.org
- National Guardianship Association. (2024). "Alternatives to Guardianship." Available at: https://www.guardianship.org
- Elder Law Section, State Bar Associations. (2024). "Elder Law Practice Standards." Various state resources.